There is a cluster of songs on the record about the same person. "Ophelia" and "The Stone", along with "Two Souls Meet in the City" all speak about a particular relationship, and the various aspects of it, and its demise.
I believe as songwriters we are meant to amplify the truth, and make the highs higher, the lows lower, and turn up the intensity. To that end, I tried to take a very real, yet not intensely dramatic event from my life and try to make it more universal.
"The Stone" is based on a poem I scratched out while on a train to Providence, RI to play a show, called "June 1st."
For once
And just this once
I socked you between the eyes
You always could blow me back
But my Honesty
And my Heart,
in an attempt to set the record straight
And get back on its feet again,
Let you have it.
You've made me teased in love
I'm even wondering if you count on the list.
I hadn't heard from her in over a week, and decided enough was enough. So I scribbled out a decently long email to her, saying she could not treat me with such disregard, and how I would not stand for it. I acknowledged that I am a bit of a pushover, but that I could no longer be trampled on anymore. I was angry, and I've never really showed that to her before.
I thought about how I would act in relationships: I would be totally submissive and willing to put up with or deal with anything a woman throws at me. If she ignores me, I worry and am crippled with anxiety. I try to be as selfless as possible, and focus all my energy on catering (and sometimes pandering) to her every need. Ultimately, it's not fair, and an unhealthy dynamic starts to form. This is what happened here.
Her response was quite trite, but quite sorry. She did not really know what to say. But she knew she would most likely hear something from me about her not being in touch. She knew I wouldn't take much more. I had caught her off guard; socked her right between the eyes with my words. For once.
So I realize this is fairly uneventful story, but that's the reality through which "The Stone" came from. It's the idea of an intimidating, "tall" figure, who dominates a relationship by her intellect, beauty, and by the control she is given by the other person. And the "small" figure, who never knew he could stand up to her, throwing that million dollar shot. David and Goliath would be the perfect imagery for what I was getting at.
So a few of the points in the song worth mentioning:
"My Beautiful, beautiful Goliath" My only concern was that referring to someone as "my beautiful Goliath" would seem ridiculous, and take away from the intensity of the song. After asking around, people enjoyed that image, because it showed her might and her aesthetic beauty all at once, so I left it in.
"She said 'Stop, 'cause I don't know what it's like to lose' " While she never said this explicitly, I think it points to how those given power by another have the tendency to feel spoiled by it, the way a child who just became a king or queen might react to losing in a game.
"And you fall (and I fall apart watching you fall apart)" To write what I did, although it seems quite trivial in this posting, was torture for me. So it was like the destruction of two people at once. Mutually-assured destruction, for she and I.
Here's the lyrics to "The Stone:
[I am David
And I am practicing my sling
And you know this, you showed it...]
A similar scene is taking over me
When you step into the room, I bow down
You look around, you look around
And see everything you want is what you've found
And I am at a loss
'Cause I am David
And I am practicing my sling
Oh, and you know this, you showed it
'Cause the throwing part is the hardest thing for me
You twist and turn me around
You take the love I give to you
And you hide it
My beautiful, beautiful Goliath
She said "Stop, 'cause I don't know what it's like to lose"
"And with the way this is going, baby, why must you make me choose?"
In that space between fantasy and faith
I came back, and started making my way
To where I step into this battleground with you
I am David
And I am practicing my sling
Oh, you know this, you showed it
'Cause the throwing part is the hardest thing for me
You twist and turn me around
You take the love I give to you
And you hide it
My beautiful, oh...
And my words hit you like a Stone
And my words hit you like a Stone
My words
Hit you
Like a stone
And you fall, you fall, you fall
Oh I
Did arrive
Ready to fight this time.
You fall (And I fall apart watching you fall apart)
The song is my "hardest" to date, and we're still working on how we should record it. The discussion is centered on how this song could live on an album with less aggressive songs. But I am positive it can, and think it tells an important story.
Thanks for reading, please visit www.johnschmittalbum.com should you wish to contribute to making this record happen! Another preview tomorrow!!
John
No comments:
Post a Comment