Where are you darlin', when my
Moon is risin', and your
Sun is shinin' down
What are you doin', are you
Missin' me
The way that I'm missin' you now
The river goes on and on, and the
Sea that divides us is a
Temporary one, and the
Bridge will bring us back together
What are you doin', goin'
Down in to Soho as I
Get my rest tonight
What are you doin', are you
Busy with your world
Well I wish you were busy with mine
The river goes on and on, and the
Sea that divides us is a
Temporary one, and the
Bridge will bring us back together
All things must pass, I guess. I just can't shake the idea of standing in the street telling her "see? I'd get hit by cab if you don't kiss me again!" For the sake of my sanity, knowing how many friends, family, and co-workers either are reading this or might be reading this, I won't delve too far into the gory details.
I just, just, just can't shake it. I get it though. I'm a fool - correction - you're a fool, John. I feel the need to scold myself. And I guess in the grand scheme of things, it won't mean too much. But man, when you smell it, feel it, taste it, hear it, and it blows you away, maybe there is much to be made out of one night.
I retreat though. Back into my music. I even thought about my faith today, about how blessed I was to have my talents and my love of music, despite the Bills and Sabres losing, and all the other stuff. I miss that closeness, the way I could feel God between my shirt and my skin, the way my faith informed my mind, and shed a wisdom on my life and others.
So what happens when the person others seek out for advice has his own saga? That's always my dilemma. I don't have that person to go to with the answers; for most of my friends, for my family, that's me. You sift through the bullshit, and get the person on the right track, and show them that they did this or that badly or not enough.
But man, I havent felt this sort of shook-ness since over a year ago, with Meg. And really, my reaction is to downplay all this, so that people reading it will not think I'm crazy or desperate, but let me be clear:
I am very much fine and okay being alone and single and a musician and songwriter, who has more and more grey hair, doesn't ever sleep in on weekends, keeps a messy bedroom, and chases the highest point of the highest mountain. I am content with seeking a dream at all cost, working hard, and loving my friends as family, and my family that much more. I am secure in my ability to judge character, to make people laugh, and to tell stories.
But I do not define myself by a woman, and I will never do so. I will never get duped again.
This shit stings. And I'll never dupe someone, either.
Goodnight. I feel better.
November 2, 2008
October 31, 2008
Creation Story
I want to tell a creation story
Where out of nothing comes everything
Out of me flows life
And positivity
From a cavern, from a soul
That feels empty.
A young man
Asserts in his mind
That he will reach the heights
Unknown by those around him
And he hopes
And prays
For love
So he creates this Person
Out of nothing
Out of intangible things and higher principles
And is all things
For all people
In a selfish attempt
To fill that void.
He looks at the void
And thinks "Is this good?"
Evening comes, and morning came
Everyday.
Cavernous space
Is my Human Race
Is my Creation Story
Where out of nothing comes everything
Out of me flows life
And positivity
From a cavern, from a soul
That feels empty.
A young man
Asserts in his mind
That he will reach the heights
Unknown by those around him
And he hopes
And prays
For love
So he creates this Person
Out of nothing
Out of intangible things and higher principles
And is all things
For all people
In a selfish attempt
To fill that void.
He looks at the void
And thinks "Is this good?"
Evening comes, and morning came
Everyday.
Cavernous space
Is my Human Race
Is my Creation Story
September 15, 2008
2am Tuesday Morning
i'm looking at my body
my laundry
my room
and my shades only let in a sliver of light
you're a fool, john.
a damn fool.
my laundry
my room
and my shades only let in a sliver of light
you're a fool, john.
a damn fool.
July 17, 2008
Old Friends
its the strangest thing
to be rapt or wrapped from afar
and not desire
but hold campaigns of forlorn enchantment
in my inner workings
we're all rooting for you babe.
on a cerebral level, rooting.
i mean, i ain't buying you a gift or something
but the crux of it is this:
when you stop loving
you'd like to think you both are in the same boat.
you'd like to think that everyone's in there
back to the girl who wanted to kiss you at age 12
but you thought kissing was a bit much
and an altogether scary prospect, and you decline
much to her embarassment
and your own-ass-kicking at an older age
you ran into this girl three years later
having garnered new friends
confidence and arrogance
and sense of humor
to see she's not doing so hot
she still has braces
and ultimately, she's struck by seeing you
she's GOT to be single
just like you
the same boat like your friends in the big city
all over
who don't "have time" to bother with dating or anything
and yet you always end up on the same topic
on how you just want someone
to love you
when you get home
you all paddle, paddle, paddle...
there's a comfort in knowing
that in your self-indulgent depressions and down spells
that when you dig down to visit your old pals -
the things that elude you
provide this hollow comfort
due primarily to familiarity
you see, we're all at the same level
we think
we're all shitty, afraid, and truly
fucked up.
we chase things that we may never catch
and discard and ruin what is too close
such is the life on the insatiable artist.
but i digress
i guess i always thought i was on par or further along
that's all
i don't want it back again
i don't dwell on it anymore
and would have never given it a thought
if i hadn't seen the correspondance by chance
congrats on being the new mrs. _________
im rooting for you
well, we all are
because we're still toiling beneath the surface
and we haven't resigned ourselves
to that life yet.
congrats on being the new mrs. ________
i'm rooting for you
because i've seen your inner-workings
and i loved the music it made
now if i could just move the fuck on
i'll fend off my old friends for another 6 months.
to be rapt or wrapped from afar
and not desire
but hold campaigns of forlorn enchantment
in my inner workings
we're all rooting for you babe.
on a cerebral level, rooting.
i mean, i ain't buying you a gift or something
but the crux of it is this:
when you stop loving
you'd like to think you both are in the same boat.
you'd like to think that everyone's in there
back to the girl who wanted to kiss you at age 12
but you thought kissing was a bit much
and an altogether scary prospect, and you decline
much to her embarassment
and your own-ass-kicking at an older age
you ran into this girl three years later
having garnered new friends
confidence and arrogance
and sense of humor
to see she's not doing so hot
she still has braces
and ultimately, she's struck by seeing you
she's GOT to be single
just like you
the same boat like your friends in the big city
all over
who don't "have time" to bother with dating or anything
and yet you always end up on the same topic
on how you just want someone
to love you
when you get home
you all paddle, paddle, paddle...
there's a comfort in knowing
that in your self-indulgent depressions and down spells
that when you dig down to visit your old pals -
the things that elude you
provide this hollow comfort
due primarily to familiarity
you see, we're all at the same level
we think
we're all shitty, afraid, and truly
fucked up.
we chase things that we may never catch
and discard and ruin what is too close
such is the life on the insatiable artist.
but i digress
i guess i always thought i was on par or further along
that's all
i don't want it back again
i don't dwell on it anymore
and would have never given it a thought
if i hadn't seen the correspondance by chance
congrats on being the new mrs. _________
im rooting for you
well, we all are
because we're still toiling beneath the surface
and we haven't resigned ourselves
to that life yet.
congrats on being the new mrs. ________
i'm rooting for you
because i've seen your inner-workings
and i loved the music it made
now if i could just move the fuck on
i'll fend off my old friends for another 6 months.
March 19, 2008
"Ah, back through the glen I rode again and my heart with grief was sore
For I parted then with valiant men whom I never shall see more
But to and fro in my dreams I go and I'd kneel and pray for you,
For slavery fled, O glorious dead, When you fell in the foggy dew." from "The Foggy Dew", traditional Irish rebellion song
_____________________________________
I don't think I've ever been passionate about my liberties and my freedom. I take them for granted, and I expect them. St. Patrick's Day, and now the Iraq War anniversary have really put that into perspective.
Would I ever die for those to come after me, for a cause that isn't tangible? No. Unfortunately, no. Not even close. I'd be the first to recant, to denounce whatever it is, and the very fact that I'm aware of that cowardice is troubling. I don't think I'm necessarily alone, either.
This very notion strikes at the heart of my current crisis of faith. Where does faith become fact in my mind? If there is no place that this occurs, what is the purpose of the faith? If there is indeed a place, where is this place specifically in my mind, because it is hazy or not even there at first thought. To die for freedom, die for my people, die for another or for a cause - it is something that is ungraspable as the cosmos, the notion of God or the afterlife, or the system in which the world works. It would take, as I often say in reference to a friend in the military or other life-threatening profession, a "greater man than I."
A greater man than I. Now that is a bit of a cop-out. It takes a man more braver than I, more self-less than I, and more responsible than I to give me my "taken for granted's". What a way to downplay their commitment. There's is something corrupt in this train of thought, I think. It's not healthy, and it's not safe.
So do I have a place where my faith meets fact, where it becomes certainty? Right now, no. I feel distant from that part of my heart and soul, but I do not feel unwelcome with it. I feel that my life sweeps me up too often, and I leave that part of me to toil on its own now, much like forgetting you left the dog outside.
But really, is there any sense of urgency that tells us we deal with eternity everyday? I think one has to believe in eternity first. I would say I have seen the eternity, in a more tangible form, when men and women clap at the Buffalo Irish Center for those fallen rebels of the 1798 Fenian rising in Ireland when they are mentioned in song. Or just in the very music itself, that me, someone really unknowing of the Irish plight in the last ten centuries, sings a song such as "The Foggy Dew" on St. Patrick's Day, and keeps those ghosts alive for another year. I feel apart of the bards, the troubadors, and the poets who have come before me. Perhaps this is the eternity the men and women knew of, and died for, the eternity that made me shout as I sang "O Glorious dead!" There is this steep admiration and awe that pours from my heart in the closing words of that song. Greater men than I, now great forever in the songs that will never, ever die.
So the fundamental problem I am getting at is that I oft have this assumed and ignored sense of invincibility. That the train really doesn't end. And "The Foggy Dew" has show me that in parts, I am right, and others not. We can live on through those that come after us, in special ways, and if you believe it, in the next life, reunited with the Life Force that I call God. But the train does end, there is finality, there is a stop, because the tangible eternity I so very much seek cannot really come, it is not of this world. It is necessary to no longer be of this world to arrive at this. And moreover, we are to be remembered only if we make this faith-turned-fact. There is no other way.
For I parted then with valiant men whom I never shall see more
But to and fro in my dreams I go and I'd kneel and pray for you,
For slavery fled, O glorious dead, When you fell in the foggy dew." from "The Foggy Dew", traditional Irish rebellion song
_____________________________________
I don't think I've ever been passionate about my liberties and my freedom. I take them for granted, and I expect them. St. Patrick's Day, and now the Iraq War anniversary have really put that into perspective.
Would I ever die for those to come after me, for a cause that isn't tangible? No. Unfortunately, no. Not even close. I'd be the first to recant, to denounce whatever it is, and the very fact that I'm aware of that cowardice is troubling. I don't think I'm necessarily alone, either.
This very notion strikes at the heart of my current crisis of faith. Where does faith become fact in my mind? If there is no place that this occurs, what is the purpose of the faith? If there is indeed a place, where is this place specifically in my mind, because it is hazy or not even there at first thought. To die for freedom, die for my people, die for another or for a cause - it is something that is ungraspable as the cosmos, the notion of God or the afterlife, or the system in which the world works. It would take, as I often say in reference to a friend in the military or other life-threatening profession, a "greater man than I."
A greater man than I. Now that is a bit of a cop-out. It takes a man more braver than I, more self-less than I, and more responsible than I to give me my "taken for granted's". What a way to downplay their commitment. There's is something corrupt in this train of thought, I think. It's not healthy, and it's not safe.
So do I have a place where my faith meets fact, where it becomes certainty? Right now, no. I feel distant from that part of my heart and soul, but I do not feel unwelcome with it. I feel that my life sweeps me up too often, and I leave that part of me to toil on its own now, much like forgetting you left the dog outside.
But really, is there any sense of urgency that tells us we deal with eternity everyday? I think one has to believe in eternity first. I would say I have seen the eternity, in a more tangible form, when men and women clap at the Buffalo Irish Center for those fallen rebels of the 1798 Fenian rising in Ireland when they are mentioned in song. Or just in the very music itself, that me, someone really unknowing of the Irish plight in the last ten centuries, sings a song such as "The Foggy Dew" on St. Patrick's Day, and keeps those ghosts alive for another year. I feel apart of the bards, the troubadors, and the poets who have come before me. Perhaps this is the eternity the men and women knew of, and died for, the eternity that made me shout as I sang "O Glorious dead!" There is this steep admiration and awe that pours from my heart in the closing words of that song. Greater men than I, now great forever in the songs that will never, ever die.
So the fundamental problem I am getting at is that I oft have this assumed and ignored sense of invincibility. That the train really doesn't end. And "The Foggy Dew" has show me that in parts, I am right, and others not. We can live on through those that come after us, in special ways, and if you believe it, in the next life, reunited with the Life Force that I call God. But the train does end, there is finality, there is a stop, because the tangible eternity I so very much seek cannot really come, it is not of this world. It is necessary to no longer be of this world to arrive at this. And moreover, we are to be remembered only if we make this faith-turned-fact. There is no other way.
January 25, 2008
recap
Last time I wrote, I was planning on seeing Brandon play at the Sidewalk Cafe. He did really well, and I think he's come so far in such a short amount of time. I think looking back at where we all came from, you don't see your skills sharpen and broaden, but they do. You can't label me as a knock-off of someone else anymore, I am my own man with my own sound. Sure, other music influences me, like anyone else, but finding my own voice has been a journey that I didn't even know I was on. In any event, I'm delighted to see that process happen in one of my best friends.
I went there with Maria, my friend from work, after seeing the movie "No Country for Old Men." Maria had been my movie buddy that week, and I saw 4 films in total, "Walk Hard," "No Country for Old Men," "I am Legend," and "There Will be Blood." I enjoyed all of them, but the Coen brother's movies stands heads and shoulders above the rest. It really was a magnificent piece of cinema, and the themes and undertones are both raw and beautiful, realistic and profound. What happens as we age? Why does it seem most older people feel disconnect? Where does fate play in this process? Is it possible for pure evil to be governed by a set of principles, much in the same way goodness is governed? Go see it, and let me know what you think.
After a very odd misunderstanding with Maria and I, I feel really good about working it out and having her as a good friend, even if she still likes the Giants.
Went to Harrisburg, saw Mark and Amanda, rode up with Jay and Brandon. It was nice to see everyone, even Tom Dose stopped out, and then I had my show. Before we left for the show, while still at Mark's house, Brandon sprained his ankle playing football with me. We didn't realize how bad it was until after my show, when it was the size of a grapefruit. We went to the ER, and were there until 4 am. A bad sprain, and he just needed to be off of it for a few days. Got home at 7am the next day.
Next was my trip to Philadelphia. Chris, Pat, Elliot, Cathy, and me piled into two cars and headed South on 95 for the day. Before we left though, we had rehearsal in Chris' garage.
Just a moment to mention Chris. This guy has really committed to playing in my band, and he is prepared, open-minded, skilled, and very calm at all times. He loves playing all kinds of music, and he has more than shown his worth playing with us on-stage. He really has fit well with me and the other guys, in terms of music and being a great friend. That's not even mentioning the other stuff...
Like, how he lets us use his garage to rehearse on the weekends! This saves me HUNDREDS of dollars, hours of time, and all kinds of headache. It is such an incredible help to me, and that's how selfless Chris is. He also is willing to drive the whole band anywhere to a show, and then he gives me shit when I offer him gas money. He drives his own car, with me and everyone else and our gear, and then when I try to give him money, he's always like "Eh, hit me up later." Well, I don't forget about that stuff, and do get him back for it later. He just gives so much, outside of the music on-stage (which I am really blessed to have with share in) that it is hard for me to not feel like we're taking him for granted. So I don't know if you're reading this, buddy, but you rock, you've helped me out more than you know, and I am really honored to be your friend first, and bandmate second. Thank you very much.
So anyways, we go to Philly, and we bring my roommate Adam along who was otherwise not busy. I think we told him about it while he was playing video games in his room or something. I knew he would have a good time, and he did.
There's alot of specifics about the Philly trip, but the main points are that we played exceptionally well, the crowd went from great, to good, to not-so-great, to poor, to terrible as the set went on, and we all agreed that the bars in Philly remind us of home, are better than NYC, and are so cheap that we wish we could have stayed the weekend. We all agreed to come back at the end of March and visit one more time. Ian came out, played with us, it was great to see him, thought he sounded really good, too.
Been going to shows, open mics, and more shows lately. It's taken alot out of me, but I think it's great. We're being offerred a show at the Cutting Room, and I think we should really see a spike in attendance there. I want to be known as my own man, who goes to things on his own accord, and I feel now that while it's getting to be that way, I still might be viewed as being "brought" by someone, or that I'm only there because Elliot is there, etc., which is not the case at all. I've been to 5 or 6 shows already without anyone else, and its important for me to show I care deeply about the music scene and the people in it, and not just be perceived as a tag-along.
That being said, Monday is the LC anniversary show at Rockwood, and I am glad I already personally know more than half of those invited to play. It's great to think I've only been here about 20 months, and I'm starting to really be involved with everyone here.
I'm going to Boston this weekend, with Vinny and Adam, and that should be awesome. I have a show outside the city, in Hopkinton, MA, and then I'm staying with Jeff. I will finally be meeting Joanna, someone I was introduced to only online through a mutual friend. She and I spend the days distracting each other from work, so it will be good to put a face to the jokes, political insights, and so on. I'm glad she's my friend, she is a true idealist, and that gives me faith about people.
Tonight I'm meeting up for dinner at the Comedy Cellar. I haven't been there in ages, since my birthday, and I'm excited to introduce someone new to the great stand-up that is always going on there. Should be a really fun night.
Other than that, I couldn't be more active going to see shows, playing with people, booking shows, travelling, and otherwise living my life. The saddest thing in life is wasted talent. Remember that, and live accordingly.
That's the coming and going in my life now. I'm nervous, excited, hopeful, and really just feeling tired. Such is the life of a 24 year old scraping by, chasing a dream.
I went there with Maria, my friend from work, after seeing the movie "No Country for Old Men." Maria had been my movie buddy that week, and I saw 4 films in total, "Walk Hard," "No Country for Old Men," "I am Legend," and "There Will be Blood." I enjoyed all of them, but the Coen brother's movies stands heads and shoulders above the rest. It really was a magnificent piece of cinema, and the themes and undertones are both raw and beautiful, realistic and profound. What happens as we age? Why does it seem most older people feel disconnect? Where does fate play in this process? Is it possible for pure evil to be governed by a set of principles, much in the same way goodness is governed? Go see it, and let me know what you think.
After a very odd misunderstanding with Maria and I, I feel really good about working it out and having her as a good friend, even if she still likes the Giants.
Went to Harrisburg, saw Mark and Amanda, rode up with Jay and Brandon. It was nice to see everyone, even Tom Dose stopped out, and then I had my show. Before we left for the show, while still at Mark's house, Brandon sprained his ankle playing football with me. We didn't realize how bad it was until after my show, when it was the size of a grapefruit. We went to the ER, and were there until 4 am. A bad sprain, and he just needed to be off of it for a few days. Got home at 7am the next day.
Next was my trip to Philadelphia. Chris, Pat, Elliot, Cathy, and me piled into two cars and headed South on 95 for the day. Before we left though, we had rehearsal in Chris' garage.
Just a moment to mention Chris. This guy has really committed to playing in my band, and he is prepared, open-minded, skilled, and very calm at all times. He loves playing all kinds of music, and he has more than shown his worth playing with us on-stage. He really has fit well with me and the other guys, in terms of music and being a great friend. That's not even mentioning the other stuff...
Like, how he lets us use his garage to rehearse on the weekends! This saves me HUNDREDS of dollars, hours of time, and all kinds of headache. It is such an incredible help to me, and that's how selfless Chris is. He also is willing to drive the whole band anywhere to a show, and then he gives me shit when I offer him gas money. He drives his own car, with me and everyone else and our gear, and then when I try to give him money, he's always like "Eh, hit me up later." Well, I don't forget about that stuff, and do get him back for it later. He just gives so much, outside of the music on-stage (which I am really blessed to have with share in) that it is hard for me to not feel like we're taking him for granted. So I don't know if you're reading this, buddy, but you rock, you've helped me out more than you know, and I am really honored to be your friend first, and bandmate second. Thank you very much.
So anyways, we go to Philly, and we bring my roommate Adam along who was otherwise not busy. I think we told him about it while he was playing video games in his room or something. I knew he would have a good time, and he did.
There's alot of specifics about the Philly trip, but the main points are that we played exceptionally well, the crowd went from great, to good, to not-so-great, to poor, to terrible as the set went on, and we all agreed that the bars in Philly remind us of home, are better than NYC, and are so cheap that we wish we could have stayed the weekend. We all agreed to come back at the end of March and visit one more time. Ian came out, played with us, it was great to see him, thought he sounded really good, too.
Been going to shows, open mics, and more shows lately. It's taken alot out of me, but I think it's great. We're being offerred a show at the Cutting Room, and I think we should really see a spike in attendance there. I want to be known as my own man, who goes to things on his own accord, and I feel now that while it's getting to be that way, I still might be viewed as being "brought" by someone, or that I'm only there because Elliot is there, etc., which is not the case at all. I've been to 5 or 6 shows already without anyone else, and its important for me to show I care deeply about the music scene and the people in it, and not just be perceived as a tag-along.
That being said, Monday is the LC anniversary show at Rockwood, and I am glad I already personally know more than half of those invited to play. It's great to think I've only been here about 20 months, and I'm starting to really be involved with everyone here.
I'm going to Boston this weekend, with Vinny and Adam, and that should be awesome. I have a show outside the city, in Hopkinton, MA, and then I'm staying with Jeff. I will finally be meeting Joanna, someone I was introduced to only online through a mutual friend. She and I spend the days distracting each other from work, so it will be good to put a face to the jokes, political insights, and so on. I'm glad she's my friend, she is a true idealist, and that gives me faith about people.
Tonight I'm meeting up for dinner at the Comedy Cellar. I haven't been there in ages, since my birthday, and I'm excited to introduce someone new to the great stand-up that is always going on there. Should be a really fun night.
Other than that, I couldn't be more active going to see shows, playing with people, booking shows, travelling, and otherwise living my life. The saddest thing in life is wasted talent. Remember that, and live accordingly.
That's the coming and going in my life now. I'm nervous, excited, hopeful, and really just feeling tired. Such is the life of a 24 year old scraping by, chasing a dream.
January 14, 2008
"Stone"
A similar scene taking over me
When you step into a room, I bow down
___________
___________
Cuz I am David
And I am practicing my sling
Oh, and you know this, you showed it
'Cuz the throwing part is the hardest thing for me
You twist and spin me around
You take the love I give to you and you hide it
My beautiful, beautiful Goliath
She said 'stop, cuz I don't know what it's like to lose'
'And with the way things happened, why must you make me choose?'
In that space, between Fantasy and Faith
Is where a man must make his case
And step into the battleground with you
Cuz now I am David
And I am practicing my sling
Oh, and you know this, you showed it
'Cuz the throwing part is the hardest thing for me
You twist and spin me around
You take the love I give to you and you hide it
My beautiful, beautiful...
And my words hit you like a stone
And my words hit you like a stone
My words
Hit you
Like a stone.
And you fall
Oh, you fall
I did arrive
Ready to fight this time
When you step into a room, I bow down
___________
___________
Cuz I am David
And I am practicing my sling
Oh, and you know this, you showed it
'Cuz the throwing part is the hardest thing for me
You twist and spin me around
You take the love I give to you and you hide it
My beautiful, beautiful Goliath
She said 'stop, cuz I don't know what it's like to lose'
'And with the way things happened, why must you make me choose?'
In that space, between Fantasy and Faith
Is where a man must make his case
And step into the battleground with you
Cuz now I am David
And I am practicing my sling
Oh, and you know this, you showed it
'Cuz the throwing part is the hardest thing for me
You twist and spin me around
You take the love I give to you and you hide it
My beautiful, beautiful...
And my words hit you like a stone
And my words hit you like a stone
My words
Hit you
Like a stone.
And you fall
Oh, you fall
I did arrive
Ready to fight this time
January 11, 2008
January 10, 2008
The shows coming up...
1/12 - Crimson Frog - Harrisburg, PA
1/19 - Dr. Watson's - Philadelphia, PA
1/26 - Enter Stage Left: Coffeehouse Series - Hopkinton, MA (Boston)
2/2 - V-Day Benefit - Fredonia, NY
2/8 - Snooty Pig - Corning, NY
2/9 - Johnny's Irish Pub - Rochester, NY
2/16 - Uncommon Ground - Chicago, IL
2/22 - Wicked Willy's - New York, NY
2/23 - Brooklyn Coffee and Tea House - Providence, RI
3/6 - Proof of Purchase: presented by Bess Rogers - Bar 4 - Brooklyn, NY
3/7 - Back Fence - New York, NY
3/8 - Wicked Willy's - New York, NY
3/14 - Snooty Pig - Corning, NY
3/15 - Kold One's - Niagara Falls, NY
3/17 - Snooty Pig - Corning, NY
3/22 - Back Fence - New York, NY
3/26 - Wicked Willy's - New York, NY
4/2 - Rockwood Music Hall - New York, NY
1/19 - Dr. Watson's - Philadelphia, PA
1/26 - Enter Stage Left: Coffeehouse Series - Hopkinton, MA (Boston)
2/2 - V-Day Benefit - Fredonia, NY
2/8 - Snooty Pig - Corning, NY
2/9 - Johnny's Irish Pub - Rochester, NY
2/16 - Uncommon Ground - Chicago, IL
2/22 - Wicked Willy's - New York, NY
2/23 - Brooklyn Coffee and Tea House - Providence, RI
3/6 - Proof of Purchase: presented by Bess Rogers - Bar 4 - Brooklyn, NY
3/7 - Back Fence - New York, NY
3/8 - Wicked Willy's - New York, NY
3/14 - Snooty Pig - Corning, NY
3/15 - Kold One's - Niagara Falls, NY
3/17 - Snooty Pig - Corning, NY
3/22 - Back Fence - New York, NY
3/26 - Wicked Willy's - New York, NY
4/2 - Rockwood Music Hall - New York, NY
January 8, 2008
An email to a centered-man, on centering.
from John Schmitt hide details 10:33 am (0 minutes ago)
to Christopher Kuffner
bcc john@eltrainent.com
date Jan 8, 2008 10:33 AM
subject The limits of a Dual-world, and other tales...
mailed-by eltrainent.com
Chris,
Just wanted to shoot a quick email to "follow up" on the stuff we were talking about. It was REALLY refreshing to chat with someone willing to engage in such "heavy" stuff like the cosmos and the order of things, so while I don't think it happened by chance, I still feel inclined to say thank you!
I also wanted to say how impressed I was with your performance, as I always am. I know it sounds like I'm a kiss-ass, but honestly, I come from a pure place in me when I say that you're just a wonderful musician and person, and it shows together, on stage.
In my search for Great Truth, I've come across something else that is very interesting. The notion of a world made of duality, and the possibility through meditation, prayer, etc to transcend this duality is just fascinating. I was reading that the only reason we know what daytime is is because we have night. The only reason we know goodness is because we know badness. I guess that's the essense of Yin and Yang as well. Being one with the presence, absence, or co-presence of something seems to be very difficult, and the stuff I've been reading says that this is difficult enough for any man.
Yet certain people, attributes, ideals can transcend this duality, meaning they do not function on the same linear plane as one normally does. When this transcension occurs, the rules of earthly world do not apply, the laws of physics are not applicable, and the ability to move through matter, space, and time are possible. It is believed that Ghandhi, Jesus, Buddha, and a few select others were able to reach this height of awareness. They become one with other things such as Love and "The System" as we know it, which cannot be lumped into a "this-or-that" duality. The absense of love in not hate, nor is hate the opposite of love. Love exists on a higher plane than other human emotions or ideas, and that is why when it is shared, it is so encompassing and beautiful. The System we live in cannot be viewed in terms of duality either, and therefore is nearly impossible for a human mind to fully comprehend. For me, God is The System, for others, it is not. However it is viewed, there are clear signs of a higher plane of existance everywhere, and we just need to be open to such things in order to tap into their potential and benefits.
So to me, the deeper I go, the more I am faced with the question of whether I want to work towards this transcension. If so, there really is no turning back, and requires complete devotion and in particular, a change in the way I live my life. But it is something to think about. Do you want to transcend?
_________________________________
The other thing I started talking about with you was what true Nihilism is. It's not the anti-establishment cliche term to talk about people overthrowing government and rejecting spirituality, but instead I think it is a beautiful way to see and live one's life.
In a nutshell, Nihilism says that as a moral being, we have the responsibility to work towards a more prosperous humanity. To accomplish this, we must be willing to sacrifice the status quo if the status quo is not successful. More importantly, we are charged with the responsibility to change it. As enlightened men, we must be willing to throw away the mores and society that will ultimately downfall us, and start anew in the hopes that a better system will arise.
Now, that has more to do with government, but on a personal level, I have taken many things from this belief. First, Nihilism recognizes that simply putting yourself in a position to be successful is something to rejoice about. Just making something a possibility is cause for celebration. You've fulfilled your end of the bargain as a moral being, as a man.
Second, with this possible success on the horizon, Nihilism does recognize that there is a very real and possible chance for failure. Simply, once you make it a possibility, there is an element of chance that could bring about the undesired effect. But that is not something to feel badly about, and we must simply make another possibility possible. Whatever the outcome, we will have progressed from our previous position and continue towards a more successful experience and life.
There is no clearer example of Nihilism than in Imperial Russia, when the Intelligensia, the educated, young, middle-to-upper class men and women worked to overthrow the Tsarist government, and then let the people sort out government how they wish. Communism came about and ultimately failed, but the fact that a more prosperous Russia was in the realm of possibility means they succeeded.
How do you feel about this?
____________________________
Sorry for going on about stuff, but you seem like someone that could handle this type of thing. Hope this finds you doing well, and I hope we can get together soon to either talk to play music.
Here are the reads I was telling you about:
The Dark Night of the Soul - St. John of the Cross
A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving
Generation X: Tales for an Accelerated Culture - Douglas Coupland
Hope you check them out, definitely let me know about what you were saying I should read.
Talk to you soon, all the best.
John
Reply Forward (X) Christopher is not available to chat
to Christopher Kuffner
bcc john@eltrainent.com
date Jan 8, 2008 10:33 AM
subject The limits of a Dual-world, and other tales...
mailed-by eltrainent.com
Chris,
Just wanted to shoot a quick email to "follow up" on the stuff we were talking about. It was REALLY refreshing to chat with someone willing to engage in such "heavy" stuff like the cosmos and the order of things, so while I don't think it happened by chance, I still feel inclined to say thank you!
I also wanted to say how impressed I was with your performance, as I always am. I know it sounds like I'm a kiss-ass, but honestly, I come from a pure place in me when I say that you're just a wonderful musician and person, and it shows together, on stage.
In my search for Great Truth, I've come across something else that is very interesting. The notion of a world made of duality, and the possibility through meditation, prayer, etc to transcend this duality is just fascinating. I was reading that the only reason we know what daytime is is because we have night. The only reason we know goodness is because we know badness. I guess that's the essense of Yin and Yang as well. Being one with the presence, absence, or co-presence of something seems to be very difficult, and the stuff I've been reading says that this is difficult enough for any man.
Yet certain people, attributes, ideals can transcend this duality, meaning they do not function on the same linear plane as one normally does. When this transcension occurs, the rules of earthly world do not apply, the laws of physics are not applicable, and the ability to move through matter, space, and time are possible. It is believed that Ghandhi, Jesus, Buddha, and a few select others were able to reach this height of awareness. They become one with other things such as Love and "The System" as we know it, which cannot be lumped into a "this-or-that" duality. The absense of love in not hate, nor is hate the opposite of love. Love exists on a higher plane than other human emotions or ideas, and that is why when it is shared, it is so encompassing and beautiful. The System we live in cannot be viewed in terms of duality either, and therefore is nearly impossible for a human mind to fully comprehend. For me, God is The System, for others, it is not. However it is viewed, there are clear signs of a higher plane of existance everywhere, and we just need to be open to such things in order to tap into their potential and benefits.
So to me, the deeper I go, the more I am faced with the question of whether I want to work towards this transcension. If so, there really is no turning back, and requires complete devotion and in particular, a change in the way I live my life. But it is something to think about. Do you want to transcend?
_________________________________
The other thing I started talking about with you was what true Nihilism is. It's not the anti-establishment cliche term to talk about people overthrowing government and rejecting spirituality, but instead I think it is a beautiful way to see and live one's life.
In a nutshell, Nihilism says that as a moral being, we have the responsibility to work towards a more prosperous humanity. To accomplish this, we must be willing to sacrifice the status quo if the status quo is not successful. More importantly, we are charged with the responsibility to change it. As enlightened men, we must be willing to throw away the mores and society that will ultimately downfall us, and start anew in the hopes that a better system will arise.
Now, that has more to do with government, but on a personal level, I have taken many things from this belief. First, Nihilism recognizes that simply putting yourself in a position to be successful is something to rejoice about. Just making something a possibility is cause for celebration. You've fulfilled your end of the bargain as a moral being, as a man.
Second, with this possible success on the horizon, Nihilism does recognize that there is a very real and possible chance for failure. Simply, once you make it a possibility, there is an element of chance that could bring about the undesired effect. But that is not something to feel badly about, and we must simply make another possibility possible. Whatever the outcome, we will have progressed from our previous position and continue towards a more successful experience and life.
There is no clearer example of Nihilism than in Imperial Russia, when the Intelligensia, the educated, young, middle-to-upper class men and women worked to overthrow the Tsarist government, and then let the people sort out government how they wish. Communism came about and ultimately failed, but the fact that a more prosperous Russia was in the realm of possibility means they succeeded.
How do you feel about this?
____________________________
Sorry for going on about stuff, but you seem like someone that could handle this type of thing. Hope this finds you doing well, and I hope we can get together soon to either talk to play music.
Here are the reads I was telling you about:
The Dark Night of the Soul - St. John of the Cross
A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving
Generation X: Tales for an Accelerated Culture - Douglas Coupland
Hope you check them out, definitely let me know about what you were saying I should read.
Talk to you soon, all the best.
John
Reply Forward (X) Christopher is not available to chat
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